I was twelve. My parents were getting divorced. At some point, my mother screamed the word "mistress". I had no ideal1 what it meant, but I thought it was beautiful. Thus, my alter ego was born.
1. This is what my southern great aunt says instead of "idea".
March 02, 2026Fellas, I just discovered Golden Goose shoes. So people are cosplaying poverty now? Cool. Great. LOVE IT. This is why I don't fuck with rich people, man. Kill em all, matter of fact. When are we going to start fucking eating them because I didn't take a 5-course meal/etiquette class when I was seventeen for nothing.Like, fuck off with the cosplaying adversity. It's the goddamn Oppression Olympics out here. Have you ever even had a job? And I don't mean TikTok lip-syncing videos, or YouTube views paid for with daddy's credit card.When are people going to realize that it's like the same 10 motherfuckers who own everything? The same people that own the hospitals also own the pharmaceutical and insurance companies. Everything in the United States is for profit. Nothing is done out of the goodness of heart or character. When are people going to realize that?And Baley said, “Karl Marx, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”I don't know where I was going with this. I'm just pissed off, man! GET OUT OF MY HEAD, MAN!
February 27, 2026Horse Isle 2 saved my life--but not my parent's marriage. I was 12 when they got divorced. I don’t remember a lot from childhood, but I do remember wanting to get the Sam hell out of my house whenever possible.I spent a lot of time at my great-aunt Lisa’s house. She had a computer, and the internet—two things I didn’t have at my house. I came across an ad for Horse Isle 2 (HI2) while I was on Facebook, probably playing FarmVille. Little did I know that clicking on that ad would change the trajectory of my life.HI2 was booming back in 2011–2013. And I mean, booming. I’m talking a rival to Star Stable and Howrse.I was a poor kid living in rural Oklahoma. I loved horses. I would spend hours on this game. It had warning labels that would pop up and say shit like, “Hey! You’ve been online for like 12 hours. Might be time to take a break, my guy.”I would just ignore them. Like, fuck off man. It’s either stare at this screen for 16+ hours a day, or face the reality that my family is falling apart.I would dream about it. I would write all sorts of stuff down in my notebooks at school. I didn’t give a damn about schoolwork. All I wanted to do was play that game.I learned a lot about horses, too. Different breeds, colors, the types of competitions, etc.They used to have this dumbass policy in school where kids couldn’t play games unless they were educational. They tried to tell me I couldn’t play Horse Isle 2 once, and I was like LOL. Then I proceeded to school them on the difference between cumulus, nimbus and cirrus clouds.They left me alone after that.It was either HI2 or roleplaying as a cat on ForestPeltsDen, fellas. Don’t even get me started on that website. I spent hours roleplaying as a fucking cat. Anything to escape the reality of what was happening in my household.I also spent over $100 on my mom’s debit card when I was 12 so I could get tokens for the game. It was bad.I got scammed there once, too. This girl told me she’d give me all the shit I needed to meet Poseidon, one of the legendary Esrohs, if I gave her a sub token. She gave me 3-star tack, not the 5-star tack required to enter his cave. Then she blocked me, LOL.I reported her ass, and she had to pay me back for the value of the sub token. I wish I could remember what her username was.Man, I really went through some shit on that game.There was one player named GoodDonkey (a grown-ass adult, mind you) who had all these weird rules for communicating with them. They’d post shit on their profile like “NOT ACCEPTING BUDDY REQUESTS.”Okay? No one gives a fuck, pal. You’re a 40-year-old playing a game with a bunch of 10-year-olds. Please be serious.They owned all the good Thoroughbred horses, though. It used to piss me off so bad.The Thoroughbred I owned, Bosco, had horrible stats. He was perfect to me, though. Rest in peace, my guy.But GoodDonkey? Bro owned hundreds of Thoroughbreds. That breed was their thing. As if the rest of us peasants weren’t allowed to own them. They all had incredible stats, insane amounts of experience points, and gorgeous tack.I hated their ass. Matter of fact, I still do to this day.GoodDonkey—if you’re reading this, fuck you.I only hope you didn’t take your bullshit on over to Horse Isle 3 (Hi3). God help us all if you did.Anyway.What I’m trying to say is that should you find yourself in the midst of your parents’ divorce, take a stab at HI3.Unfortunately, HI2 is no longer with us because Adobe murdered Flash Player. It’s 3D now, which sucks, and they took away a lot of the great aspects of the second game.But it does the job.It keeps me goin, you know.That’s all a fella can really ask for at the end of the day.
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